Tag Team Wrestling (1986)
Sports

Publisher

Data East USA, Inc.

Tag Team Pro Wrestling. They spent about as much time programming as they did coming up with that name. Most of the animation in this game was accomplished by turning the little guys sideways, so the whole thing plays like a bad Final Fantasy movie. For example, a body slam would consist of one wrestler suddenly appearing sideways above another wrestler's head. The graphics jump around like this so much, it may look like something has gone wrong with your Nintendo. Don't worry, it's just a bad game.

The system for doing moves was also very ingenious. Most games require you to go through this unnecessary sequence I call, "using the controller." Not Tag Team Pro Wrestling. Instead of actually controlling your guy during an action sequence, you scroll through a list of untranslated moves like "Enzui Giri!" and pick one. Then you relax and watch the little guys run around and play by themselves. And I believe "Enzui Giri" translates into: "You buy any game, white devil! Ha ha!" Actually, Andrew Turner informed me differently:

"Aaccording the online Japanese<=>English dictionary Enzui Giri means Afterbrain Duty... which perhaps explains why they didn't bother translating it..."

But no wrestling game would be complete with just bad graphics and unresponsive controls. A good game needs clever names. Names that strike fear into the hearts of enemies. However, the names in this game were decided by a group of racoons randomly picking words out of an English dictionary and chaining them together. The results were "The Ricky Fighters" vs. "The Strong Bads."


Becoming the "Super Champion" requires something like 50 wins, but I think anyone playing this game long enough to accomplish that probably won't be able to form sentences well enough to tell anyone about it.